Saturday, June 18, 2016

Are you a productive and determined person, or just Manic-Depressive?

In this photo: The stock photo cake we all deserve

As you fill your every waking hour with commitment after commitment you may start to feel you finally got a handle on this whole life thing. When that happens step back and analyze whether or not your brain is emitting a series of chemicals in an abnormal way and that is the only reason why you are feeling so unfettered by the pain of human existence. Now start working on this cake! It is three in the morning and somebody needs to be making this cake. Might as well be you. Hey why don't you also start to write that screenplay you've been thinking about making all these years! Try not to get too much flour on the keyboard as you do both at the same time and also smoke a cigarette. You're a real go-getter. "Go-getter done" as you always like to say.

Anyway maybe take a moment and think about whether or not you have slept in the last few weeks. If the answer to that question is no make sure you drink more coffee! Completely stop listening to your body and allow your mania to blissfully pull you away from the problems of the universe. Most importantly don't forget about that cake! It is four in the morning and you have friends that would be so excited if you gave them a cake. Make sure you make it extra spongey and moist. Don't forget the flour! And also eggs. Most cakes have flour and eggs. No reason to look up a recipe you are a regular chef and could probably make this cake from memory because you are so good at everything you do.

As you forget about the pain of human existence and munch munch on this cake cake. Don't forget that research from the University of Michigan shows that you are probably manic-depressive. Yes, specifically you Alicia. Quit working on that cake and go to bed Alicia. And that is everything that the University of Michigan reported!

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